30 yrs and VH1 is all I get.

I am almost thirty. A milestone to those vain enough to start a blog entry with "I am almost thirty". And to thirty I say "yuck!" Now that I'm older and entering the age of reflection (soon after is the favorite age... age of senility).

Years back in the late eighties I was sitting at a friends house watching VH1. I was watching a B52's video that was on. I couldn't tell you how I ended up on VH1, but I do know that I was watching MTV only moments before that. More than likely I was running away from a Jodi Whatley video. But back then everybody was running away from a Jodi Whatley video and into the arms of Taylor Dayne. As I watched the end of the B52's video a fear rolled over me. A fear of what was going to be on next. Will it be Hall & Oates ? Gasp! Will it be solo Mick Jagger? The Horror! Or will it be... no!... anything but....NO! Rod Stewart!!!! From the depths of hell, why?!?!?

When you are eleven or twelve years old Rod Stewart is the ultimate old fart music. The kind of music that makes your repressed house mom come out of her momminess and into a hip shaking, gyrating horror show. Isn't that enough reason to hate Rod Stewart? Yes. But there are more reasons. Reasons that will go unmentioned. It'll take too much time and there are other things I need to do with my life. But in short.... I'll mention the semen/stomach pump incident. ( I know, I know... you heard the same thing about Bon Jovi... I think they were in the same room)

The point being, when you are a kid there you'd never think to yourself there would ever come a day where you would be a watcher of VH1. As the thought would be, you would never be a watcher of a Rod Stewart video. Since VH1 has a hard on for Rod Stewart, you would think they will always be playing Rod.

In the recent years VH1 has taken on programing. As we all know MTV has been nothing but programming for the past 10-12 years. To appease us they gave us MTV2, but that's a separate story in and of itself (next time). For years I struggled to keep MTV on my T.V. screen. I stayed when they put on Singled Out. I stayed when they put on Road Rules, then Real World/Road Rules Challenge. I almost made through Room Raiders before I realized what most had given into by now. MTV is not a channel that wants my thirty year old ass. That is what they made VH1 for. A retirement home for old MTV watchers. They make it as comfortable as possible. When watching VH1 now, you can see all sorts of things of interest. For one thing when they do play music videos (which is late at night), and the videos are waaaaay better than the choices on MTV. From VH1 you get: Death Cab for Cutie, Goldfrapp, White Stripes, The Frey, Morningwood (the last two are alright, but in comparison with another G-Unit video.... I'll take it) and more! But it gets worse! And by worse I mean better! All their programing is geared for nostalgia. Any program they have that starts with " I love the..." is great. They do specials on the "Awesomely Bad (fill in the blank) Videos". What's better than watching bad videos and making fun of them? Watching VH1 tear down Rod Stewart on one of those specials, that's what. They have the freak show that is called the Surreal Life and it's spin off's. The channel has won me over over. Nothing saddens me more than the thought of liking VH1. The question becomes: "Do I like VH1 because they pander to my age range? Leaving behind those they used to embrace (like MTV) or is it that I'm old and don't have my finger on the pulse of America youth?

Soon I will be thirty. I think of myself as a hip music guy. I own my copy of Arcade Fire. I'm a college radio music fan. An indie rock scene fan. I'm a snob. But I'm also a VH1 watcher. So fuck MTV. I want my. I want my. I want my VH1.

And if you happen to be older than me.... say by eight years. They gave you a convalescent home in VH1 classic. Where you can widdle away at your golden years in senility, watching Rod Stewart videos and imagine he's right there in the room with you.

On a side note. I highly recommend clicking on this weeks links I placed in this post. You won't be sorry. On second thought.... you might.